My latest obsession

I accept that I have slight tendencies toward OCD. It's a gift and a curse. The gift aspect is that I'm very organized and am a good team worker. The curse is that when I become obsessed with something I tune out the rest of the world...my kids....my husband....my life. My lastest obsession is MOPS. I belong to a group called Mothers of Preschoolers. It's a wonderful group and I have met amazing women through this group. Next year I will be on the leadership team, which is called steering. I'm so excited. However my OCD is kickin' in. It's not even May and I've already made a schedule for what crafts we are going to do. (Yes I'm the creative coordinator).

The gift of this particular obsession is I'm learning to trust in people other than myself.

I've always been told that my "friends" are people I can turn to in times of crisis but I never really believed it. Logically if these people say they would be there in times of need, they will right? Well until recently (last 3 years I would say) I've never really trusted that virtue in the people around me. I guess it's because I've never had a good self-esteem. Growing up I never felt like I was "good enough". In retrospect what the people in my life that were making me feel like that were trying to push me and make me do my best. As a child I just never felt that because as a child you don't have that kind of maturity.

So getting back to trusting others. I'm at a place in my life that I have people I trust my friendship heart with. I believe MOPS helped me with this. Now I'm back on steering and ready to plow forward with 100% of my being. The curse however is I'm staying up until all hours of the night trying to figure out a craft to do (even though I already have them all planned out). I guess I feel that even though I have it "set in stone" I can do better! I can find a better craft, a cheaper craft, a more inpiring craft.... it's all that pushing my parents did to do my best and not accept second place (even though THAT IS GOOD ENOUGH)